(for Gwendolyn MacEwen)
It's the fastest colour-
driven out of nowhere no body of its own
to rein it in
it's large and ancient the colour both touched
and sound-overflowing everything into which
it just can't fit it's a gush-
rushing from the root of thing to thing
it's not the colour of coming or going
these are plain and slow as yellow
it's the clonic colour of the whelm
bearing more dimension than air its hair
is static a shocking blur it's the highest temperature
reached in a blink-exhausting-the tinted atmosphere
it transfixes with its cobalt stare slapping into you
again and again an ocean to a stone a currency submerged
it's the bully sharpening itself a bolt
of metal reaming its tinny charge its molten mutiny
cooling into a stick still lit with the scent of fear
it's the colour that can't find its way home
the lost one its way forgotten
it's a streak the colour with no clothes
a failed invisibility collapsing into being-
a bruised prostration a simple vigilance
I want to take it in my lap stroke the static from its hair
and ground it in a body of croons
I want to pat its fiery hands down and bandage up
its burnt feet and tell it no matter what no matter when
my door is always open.
Half-bred from absence fathered by silence
it's the colour of paradox it rejects
the weight of the world the burden of matter
it's the omission
of substance it is and isn't
at exactly the same moment it bears
its loss well having never known
anything else
white is the colour of laughter
held back of desire waiting
the cup's regret when drained
it's the first colour the primary wound
blindfolded it's the bowl of ashes
you pray over it flies
into fury oblivious its heat is absolute
its memory is porcelain it dreams albino
it's the colour of a promise
before it's broken the size and shape of
a child's coffin a child who never existed
a funeral never performed
white is formless and void
fragile without edges persistent
as chaos and full of light
if you touch it you'll know absence
so profound you won't feel a thing
white turns its blind eye to the leaves
eloping with grass for winter it's deaf
to the canticle of crows flying over
and utterly mute
to the autism of the stone
mistaking snow for its own infinite mind.